[FASTLARRY]

I think they already did a movie on this, but let's say, God comes to you, and says, I'm not Jewish, but Ima a wop, and lika alla gooda wops, I get a one month vacation in August. While I'm gone, I appoint you God to run things in my absence. You have all the powers I did.

What would you do. What would be your first acts, would you pass new laws, change things.

You have to think these things out, you might say, I will end death, but 1 billion Catholics see death as a promotion, and if you did that, soon the Earth would have 26 billion people and we would all starve, so death is a good thing, when you view it from Gods position.

So I would say, I will never die. The rest of you, come and go, C'est la vie.

2nd I would say, any hottie, gorgeous drop dead 10's, will find me so sexually attractive they will begin to pant like a mink in heat and find me unresistable sexually. They will follow me any where, do anything I wish.

3rd I would say, drop a 10 trillion in my checking account.

4th I would say, make me 29 again, and my Willie 2 inches longer and I would never age or get old.

5th I would say, make me the best looking most sexy man on earth.

You are saying, what about the rest of us, and I am saying, fook you guys. Who says, God has to be fair, look what Obama did when he got to be God. He fooked all of you too.

My mountain cur dogs philosophy of life, is I get everything, all you other mutts get nuttin, me me me me me me me me me me me, and if you object, I kick the shit out of ya. ha ha...

You have to live with my mountain cur, to appreciate this, we do not call her the evil witch bitch, for nuttin. Her name is abbey. She be bad. Badder than a Jack Russell, she chases Jr around who runs from her.

So let somebody become King, or god king, and that's the way they think... me me me.
All you dirt bags, are on your own.

Lets see what else I can come up with, all traffic lights turn green for me.
I have xray vision like super man.
I can fly, like super man.
I am faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive.

Of course I am bullet proof.

Johnnie Walker sends me a daily barrel of blue label. I appoint them grand official purveyor to Gods own drunk.

I have my own Island, St John's, I move everyone else off expect the servants.

I appoint the Pope to answer all the prayers, then it wont interfere with my golf games at St Andrews. You gotta problem, send it to da pope. That's why he gets paid all those big bucks for.

A good god, knows how to delegate.

Everybody tithe to me 10%. You give me 10 or you run into a bolt of lightning. I make you all, an offer you cant refuse. Or hurricane Kartrina rolls in on ya tonight and you swim with da little fishies.

I like this God job, and I am just getting rolling in it.

Lots of Gods long ago used to drop by for a little R&R I&I and do about the same thing, old Zeus, Mars, Jupiter. Bang the local hotties, drink our wine, let us worship them. The Romans had more Gods that Carters has little pills. You could have a different God, every week. The joke in the Senate was, Do you know how poor the Christians are: How poor??? They are so poor, they only have one God.
Ba Boom......................